I hate being so confused!  I know the things I want, but I don't know how I'll get them, if I'll get them, or if they are even right to get.  Maybe I've screwed so many things up that it's just not possible anymore... or maybe I'm just meant to live for a really long time not being truly happy and almost just being punished for my life choices.  I want to be happy again!  I want to feel that life is right again, and that I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing... that I'm where I'm supposed to be!  I just would really like for something to make sense.